Tuesday, June 2, 2009

the bigger one

So, what of my girls? They're still here, making me smile (and laugh) every day. Rachel has picked up on one of my catch phrases, asking me at times, "I'm making you crazy, Mommy?" She is quite the spunky one, and she sends me to sighing pretty regularly with her nonsensical questioning. We often have conversations like this:

  • Rachel: I should wash my hands now, Mommy?
  • Mommy: Yes, you definitely should wash your hands.
  • Rachel: Why?
  • Mommy: You just went potty, didn't you?
  • Rachel: I just went potty?
  • Mommy: Yes, Honey, so go wash your hands.
  • Rachel: I need to go wash my hands?
  • Mommy sighs.
  • Rachel: I'm making you crazy, Mommy?

It can be wearing at times, and I regularly have to remind myself that she's only looking for more information so she can learn, which is something I do want to encourage, right?

I have felt proud of her over the last month or so. She seems to have matured some, and is beginning to use her manners without having to be reminded. Ever since my child gained the vocabulary and know-how to do so, she's been talking back to me. I think it's the natural course for a kid, but it's one of my pet peeves (probably because I got so sick of being disrespected by children when I worked in the school system at the Elementary level). I was horrified to think how she would be talking to me and other adults if I didn't start training her otherwise right away. So, for months now, I have stopped her regularly, by putting my hand up and saying, "When Mommy asks you to do something, you only need to say, 'Yes, Ma'am,' and then you do as you are told. Anything else is disobeying." I have said it what feels like a hundred times a day, and knew I could have said it a lot more (case in point, the many conversations like the one I listed above), and I thought it would never sink in. But about two weeks ago, she started actually doing it on her own, and seems to feel accomplished every time she remembers and I praise her. It is such a relief from the contrary phase she was in. Along those same lines, she has begun obeying without questioning, even in small tasks, and, consequently, she has become a great help to me. Of course, I don't mind if she at times, with respect, asks for an explanation or request a different course of action. But there is a big difference in asking a curious "why" and a defiant "why," and I'm just working to teach her that the defiant "why" is inappropriate and disrespectful. She also is beginning to take "no" for an answer without pitching a fit [most of the time], which is a big improvement as well. I am literally sighing with relief.

On the other hand, Rachel has ceased napping. It happened sort of suddenly, and she hasn't really looked back. She did fall asleep one day last week, and she took a good nap (over an hour), but then she had trouble going to sleep that night. Oh, well, right? If she doesn't seem to need the sleep, I guess I shouldn't begrudge her giving it up. She still has "room time" in the afternoons, but we're working through the rules that go with that. Yesterday, she came out every five minutes to ask if room time was over.

So that's my big girl. I'll do a separate post about my baby girl.

2 comments:

Julie said...

The questions will drive you crazy, for sure! JI started saying, "You're driving me nuts!" I didn't realize I said it until he copied me. :) And, he also stopped napping at 2.5 - hated it. For us, room time was essential (to my sanity) so we borrowed stories on CDs from the library. "When the story is over, or the CD is silent for a LONG time, you may come out of your room - but not until then." He still loves to listen to CDs in his room. For Christmas that year, the grandparents gave him a 3-pack, and if you're interested, I can get the title for you - but they have some classic fairy tales and stories. They have been hugely helpful.

Mel said...

I just want to say that your kids are adorable. Carly seems to already show a lot of her personality in her face. Rachel just looks really sweet.

I also liked reading some of your stuff about your relationship with God. Nice stuff.